Conscious choices..
(As a reminder; the opinions expressed here is purely my own, if supported by specific science I will write a source at the bottom of the post.)
Yesterday I posted about "owning a problem". Today Id like to discuss changes and our own responsibility when it comes to making changes become real and lasting. And, when someone asks you for help, you are doing everything on you power to help that person and nothing helps, what is really going wrong there? Is it you doing something wrong?
So many people feel like they want to change something in their life, it could be breaking a habit of some kind, challenge a phobia or a belief of some kind. People say that they want to quit smoking, over-eating, or just be more social for an example. Im rather sure that each and every person on this planet sometime in life have thought "I really should stop doing this" about something specific that they do.
Just one, single, thought is seldom enough to change something that has been going on for a long time thought. You need more then that. If the second thought is "I`ll look into that later" the chance of real change lessens. How many people over the world havent bought a gym-card in january and not set foot in a gym after 1:st of march the very same year? Quite a few I reckon.
If you truly want a change you will need to look at whatever bothers you, consider how much it bothers you and then take action! The most important thing, however, is that you need to be sure that you want that change for real. What point is it going to a fitness-coach for example if you arent sure that you actually need their help with something?
So many people feel like they want to change something in their life, it could be breaking a habit of some kind, challenge a phobia or a belief of some kind. People say that they want to quit smoking, over-eating, or just be more social for an example. Im rather sure that each and every person on this planet sometime in life have thought "I really should stop doing this" about something specific that they do.
Just one, single, thought is seldom enough to change something that has been going on for a long time thought. You need more then that. If the second thought is "I`ll look into that later" the chance of real change lessens. How many people over the world havent bought a gym-card in january and not set foot in a gym after 1:st of march the very same year? Quite a few I reckon.
If you truly want a change you will need to look at whatever bothers you, consider how much it bothers you and then take action! The most important thing, however, is that you need to be sure that you want that change for real. What point is it going to a fitness-coach for example if you arent sure that you actually need their help with something?
That person will never be able to help someone who doesnt take their own responsibility about the situation. If that counselor (for those who know me this will reveal its not me Im talking about here, because I would never suggest this) says ;"Maybe you should try to go out and run for 30 minutes every day?" and you dont do that.. Guess what; you are not taking responsibility there, how could the person help you unless you actually try out what they are suggesting?
And the same thing can apply to that friend of yours who have asked you for help regarding something in their life, they will have to do their own part, take their own responisbility, if they aint motivated enough there is nothing you can do, Nothing!
And the same thing can apply to that friend of yours who have asked you for help regarding something in their life, they will have to do their own part, take their own responisbility, if they aint motivated enough there is nothing you can do, Nothing!
Its their life, no matter how harsh it seems, you can offer them whatever help you can assist with but you cant do all the work for them. Even if you did manage to help them by doing all the work the change would probably not last so long since often the patterns that we are used to come into play and if they have worked for it themselves the risk of falling back into old patterns will be huge.
There is actually another, reason for not doing all the work for someone else. That work will cost You, it will cost you probably your time and energy (not to mention if money is involved, then they will be gone as well) and you are worth more then that. Im sure that you have better ways of spending those things then on someone who wont take responsibility for themself?
There is actually another, reason for not doing all the work for someone else. That work will cost You, it will cost you probably your time and energy (not to mention if money is involved, then they will be gone as well) and you are worth more then that. Im sure that you have better ways of spending those things then on someone who wont take responsibility for themself?